Friday, 23 May 2008

The indefinable something.

For the past few days, I have been trying to define something that has been happening to me. It hasn't happened suddenly- rather gradually, developing over a period of months, and has gathered momentum in the last 8 or 10 days.
I've been sitting and obsessing over it, at times- maybe even feeling uncomfortable about it. Trying to choose between two things, if truth be told. And the choice was too difficult.
But I was told that I didn't necessarily have to choose. Indeed. Later on, the truth of it struck me. Why should I have to choose? I know the saying "You can't have your cake and eat it too" but who says I'm having my cake and eating it too? For instance, I could be having my cake, and going skydiving!
I know it doesn't make sense, but in a way, it does.
We have this overpowering need to make sense of everything, to explain every feeling, to analyse every relationship. But does everything necessarily have to make sense? It's wonderful, what's happening to me, and it doesn't make sense at all.
And suddenly, I'm okay with it. I'm not obsessing anymore.
It's not run-of-the-mill, it's not ordinary, and it definitely isn't normal. But, a Wise Man once told me, "Everything in our lives doesn't have to feel normal, sometimes strange is more familiar."
I couldn't agree more.
Thank you, oh Wise Man.


Pongy Papaya said...

*agrees with wise man*


Doubletake, Doublethink. said...

just like people don't have to be perfect, it's the quirks that define them.

you have ocd. deal with it.

Fishy! said...

@ Pongy Papaya: I'm glad!

@ Doubletake, Doublethink: I know I do. Sometimes I'm *so* obsessive it isn't even funny!

little boxes said...

really,you dont have to make sense out of things...
another wise man (orather,men) once said, "let it be"...
try doing helps.

little boxes said...

*or rather,men...i meant

speedpost said...

Aah? Tai?
But I'm pretty sure you'll do the right thing. Whatever that is.

Fishy! said...

@ Little Boxes: "There will be an answer- let it be..." eh? Very fitting.

@ Speedpost: Ha. Sometimes the 'right thing' is entirely a matter of perspective.

Tygr Tygr Burning Bright said...

who was the wise man?

Fishy! said...

@ Tygr Tygr Burning Bright: Just a Wise Man I know. Don't worry. :)

the soliloquist said...

Making sense of things is about the worst occupation I've come across.

p.s. Eat this cake. You can always bake another one. You make damn good cakes.

Elendil said...

The things that make the least sense are always the most beautiful. Like Kubla Khan. Well, that makes sense really. But still.

Fishy! said...

@ The Soliloquist: Yup... I think I shall follow your advice. Heh.

@ Elendil: You're absolutely right.

SPIRITed! said...

A Wise Man once said:
The best things in life aren't things at all.

Esmo said...

i always thought that the wise man once said a little nonsense now and then is relished by the wisest men!!!
ah well, must have been a different wise man!!!
screw it...bring on the chicken!!!!!!

JoƩ B R said...

yeah and if esmo dunt mind, i'd like a piece of the chicken as well!

Fishy! said...

@ Spirited!: Yeah, that's true too, in a sense.

@ Esmo: Well yeah, there are lots of different wise men. Haha! And you have to come over for the chicken.

@ Joe BR: He might just mind, you know. He loves it dearly, and might want to keep all of it for himself. But don't worry, I'll keep some separate for you. Heh.